As my mind wonders off an I slip into peace
That's when my story unfolds an my demons are unleashed
I'm always standing in the mirror there looking at my reflection
I turn away hastily looking for another direction.
But all around me is black and I have nowhere to run
Just me and this mirror an my reflection of everything that has been done
Who is this staring back at me?
My deranged thoughts create fog an make it hard for me to see
I look closer an then it begins
My whole body begins to cringe
She's the dark side of me
The half filled with struggle the burns within me
She doesn't want to feel this way but something keeps bringing her down
She's running in circles hoping to be found
She always hides what she can't bear to speak
One word of those thoughts her emotions leak
So she keeps a smile on her face to let everyone know she's okay
You can see it in her eyes she doesn't want to feel what she has to say.
I want to tell her I know how she feels
I know the darkness and the game it deals
The past haunts her thoughts that keep her asleep at night
Wanting to be at peace she gives up the fight .
She can't face her demons at least not today...
So she folds up her hands and this she begins to pray
Heavenly father shield me tonight for tomorrow we will try again.
To face the demons that conquer me from within
For you are the only one who knows truly how I feel
The only one who guides me away from the emotions I deal.
I believe in you because you gave me a reason of hope, that landed the answer straight to my heart
Speechless you gave me wisdom and I knew if I face the pain a new life I will start.
Father you're the only one who can make me feel like I can get myself back
You comfort my heart when confidence I lack.
Help me face my reflection when I begin to sleep
Help me face my demons when the darkness begins to creep.
I always seem to lose myself on the way to finding me
My awful thoughts make that good half hard to see.
So be my light when I can't see
An be my reassurance when I second guess me.
All day I am confused fine one minute the next I can't take it
a smile to hold back the darkness but I fake it.
. An when I get ready to face what I lived in the past
I close my eyes
An i say this prayer to the lord real fast
You are my peace even though I try and try to overcome what's real
You help me reflect the good things I desperately want to feel.
Everyday it's the same routine I have one of these spiels.
Alone in the dark I beg to be healed
I want to give up but my better half keeps me going
My dreams are the closest I get to emotionally knowing.
When I'm awake I cower down to things that may make me seem week
When I'm sleeping I go through hell for desperate answers I seek
Father I wish the light could have all of my heart
But for now my demons hold half that part
I thank you for not giving up when I failed time and time again
I've learned patience is a virtue something
I haven't yet got the chance to win.
So the days drag on an I begin to see hope in her eyes.
When I see her she's scared of herself.
That maybe that hope will die
But she sticks to her guns and wonders her dreams,
Knowing reality is nothing as it seems.
She faces the most horrifying things when she begins to flashback
The darkness is lurking an always out to attack!
She falls an starts to cry, just desperately wanting to know reasons why?
The darkness has almost won, dragging her away
She's had all she can take!
Until her demon made one fatal mistake
The dark corner began to beam little bits of light, and the noise significantly went down
Her demon reminded her of hope and her voice she had then found
She covers her ears an begins to scream
I CANT TAKE>> ITS ONLY A DREAM
She's astonished an can't believe she felt the slightest bit better
She voiced her opinion
She's writing this letter
From there on out she knew what she had to do
An she looked in the mirror an said demons to hell with you.
And from then on out she felt like she didn't need her dreams to save her from her sin
She finally feels like she can emotionally grasp things again
But just one thing she has yet to do is voice to herself what brought her pain
So her words can soak up the rest of her rain
So she stood there sober...
Going to face what was hiding deep inside
Then she folds her hands up an says with pride
Heavenly father you have showed me the way
You gave me a reason to look forward to each an everyday
I ask that you take away the bad things
I reminisce from my past
I forgive the ones who have hurt me
So my soul can be free at last.
An yelling in my face..
Take away the anger and resentment
Every last trace.
Heal my confusion and questions why?
All of the fear an all of the lies.
Let me grow from here on out.
Dealing with changes when they come about
No more crying to myself at night about things I can't change.
No more feeling like my situations will ever rearrange
If only I knew overcoming the bad would have been like this
I could have spent a lot of years in nothing but bliss.
My lessons are learned.
My demons are burned.
Slow down my running,
An wipe away my tear
An I thank you again for helping me face my mirror.
In the last three years, I have been coming to Crete yearly and making it a part of my life for 2-3 months a year. The rest of the time I live on a small Thai island that is truly paradise, and I tha...
Since my accident on June 10, 2015, I have had a lot of alone time to think about my life. Number 1. I am a healer. It is a gift from the Creator. I use my gift when I am asked to. That is how I was t...
The dark side of the light? It is a place that all of us have dipped our toe into at times. Let me talk about PTSD. That is my dark side. It has been a visitor since I was 21 years old I am now 71.
On June tenth of 2015 at 11:00 in the morning I was forced off the road by a car passing in a curve. To avoid the car I left the road and hit a cement road barrier at about 35 miles an hour. The bike ...
Running my meditation website has really brought me joy as I try to share with others beneficial ways to relax, de-stress and get back to the Love and Joy we all are in our core. However, there is som...
There is an interesting thing that happens when you step into the energy of 'knowing.' A feeling of knowing goes beyond a feeling of belief. In other words, telling yourself 'I know I will lose ten po...
Here is my first entry to say hello to anyone stopping by to read this. I hope this will be an interesting way to connect online with like-minded people for personal enrichment and gaining more knowle...